Choices of Tradition

A bride and groom face a lot of choices when they are planning their ceremony and reception for their wedding. Most families come from a variety of backgrounds, and different people have different ideas about what makes a wedding special. This includes different religious upbringing and cultural differences when it comes to wedding traditions. As you seek to bring together two different families, you have to make sure everyone feels like their particular point-of-view is respected on your special day.

For example, my friend Taylor recently married her long-term boyfriend Alex. Taylor’s family came from a long line of strong Jewish tradition while Alex’s family had Christian connections. They thought long and hard about how to avoid making any members of the family feel isolated or in some way not important.

To do this, Taylor and Alex combined elements of their different heritages in their ceremony and reception. While they followed a more Christian format for their vows and the message delivered by their preacher, they also crushed the glass after the final “I do” at the altar. They also incorporated a foot washing ceremony to show their spiritual and romantic commitment to each other.



At the reception, the couple was raised in chairs for the traditional Jewish hora or “chair dance.” After this, they danced their more contemporary first dance. In doing this, Taylor and Alex made sure all their family members and traditions were honored on their special day. This show of unity was a great way for the two different families to come together and join each other as equals as their children entered into marriage.




And remember, no matter what traditions you choose to follow or not follow is your decision alone. You should not feel pressured to do anything you feel uncomfortable with on your wedding day because, most importantly, at the end of it all you are just two people who have sworn yourself to the other.